The Dutch paradox
Incomprehensible
’Oefenen, oefenen, oefenen’ (practice x 3): behold the mantra I impart to all my students.
That’s all fine, but it’s a well-known problem that - apart from their faithful teacher - there’s hardly anyone here to practice Dutch with.
Most people in the Netherlands speak English and are eager to show it off.
‘I start in Dutch’, Kylie from Australia shares with the group, ‘they reply in English, I persist in Dutch, they persist in English. In the end, they always win.’
The other students murmur in unison.
Kylie is desperate to know: ‘Is my Dutch really that bad?’
Everybody chuckles.
’It’s not you, it’s us’, I try to console her.
Yes, even I, the faithful teacher, do not always speak Dutch with foreigners I encounter. In my defense: I usually do start in Dutch, while they persevere in English. (But that aside.)
Even the non-native speakers’ spouses decline to speak Dutch. Speaking English is simply faster, and speed is apparently always of the essence.
Also in love.
Even in love.
Some students come up with creative solutions, like the Swedish Kitte: ‘When me and my boyfriend walk the dog together, we always speak Dutch.’
That sounds very promising to the group.
’Which comes down to once a week at the most’, she grins.
Other solutions, like speaking Dutch while cooking together, also quickly fall through.
In short, outside of class chances for active oefenen are virtually nil.
’Until’, Kris from the States remarks, ‘you get included in a circle of Dutch friends. Usually your partner’s.’
Her classmates leap up. Could there be a way out of this deadlock?
Where individuals in stores, bars, at work and on the street invariably won’t address you in their mother tongue, the Dutch group of friends demands that you participate in their advanced Dutch conversations from day 1. Gone is the compassion with your entry level.
Suddenly, English has become a no-go area.
Kris: ’Last weekend they asked me, “Wanneer ga je onze taal leren?”. (When are you going to learn our language?) This is my third Dutch course!’
Behold the Dutch paradox.
Sure, I am Always Talkin’ Food, but I teach NT2 (Dutch as a second language) on the side. Mainly to young foreigners who came to Amsterdam for or with love and intend to stay. For privacy reasons the names in these columns are fictitious.
Food lingo
(Red/white) wine - de (rode/witte) wijn
Cheese board - de kaasplank
Cheese fondue - de kaasfondue
Kaaszaken
The Dutch are way more proud of their cheeses than of their native language. Notwithstanding the French sounding name, Fromagerie Kef sells a huge assortment of beautiful Dutch regional cheeses. From hard to soft ones, from cow’s milk to goat’s or sheep’s milk. And always accompanied by a good portion of explanation of the origins and taste profiles. And in case you didn’t know, these Dutch cheeses are not only awesome on a boterham (slice of bread) or a kaasplankje, but also great for kaasfondue.
Fromagerie Kef, Marnixstraat 192 Amsterdam. Open Tue 10:00 AM-6:00 PM, Wed-Fri 10:00 AM-6:30 PM, Sat 9:30 AM-6 PM. (Also shops in Amsterdam-Oost and Noord)