She is from the Donbass. That is, after having to flee Crimea more than a decade ago, she migrated to the Donbass.
Until she had to flee from there too.
“Twice I lost everything, twice I had to start all over again”, she says, raising two manicured fingers in the air.
Now she lives with her two teenage children in a refugee shelter just outside Amsterdam. Her husband stayed behind.
We sit next to each other at a so-called Havendiner. A private initiative that originated exactly a decade ago, treating 100 refugees to a free meal each Monday. It started with Syrian refugees. Now different groups alternate.
Tonight a Ukrainian group of mostly women and children sit down at gourmet restaurant Choux, which is celebrating its own tenth anniversary by hosting this edition of Havendiner.
I ask her if she wants water with her meal. Resolutely, she declines. “That's not good for your body. I know, because I am a health specialist.”
She tells me she studied health in her motherland. Now she teaches face yoga classes once a week. “People are always busy with the condition of their body, but they forget about their face. Whereas doing face yoga daily is beneficial to your whole body.”
She adds, “Come join us sometime. My treat”.
She scrolls through her smartphone and shows me some photos. “Look, this was me ten years ago and this is me now. I look younger now! Don't I? It’s really hard work. But it pays off.”
It’s true, she radiates.
She has no choice but to keep going, she says. To make the most of every day. There is no point in lamenting what has been. She has to look forward. Start afresh each day.
For she will not be broken.
Time and again, she brings her hands together to express her gratitude towards me, for everything my country has done for her.
And with each “thank you”, I feel a little more uneasy.
For once, the conversation was not in Dutch, but in English. She felt she had to learn English first. Now she is ready for Dutch classes.
Moving lingo
Refugee - de vluchteling
Flee - vluchten
Lose - verliezen
Look forward/ahead - vooruitkijken
